07 May A Landmark Birthday
I made it. I’m bloody lucky to have to got this far, I know many who didn’t.
It’s good to feel good. Eating well, exercising and thinking good thoughts (work in progress) make me feel good. The happier my head is, the better my body works.
Alcohol turns me into a twat. More than two drinks and I talk crap, make bad choices and feel dreadfully sick. I now recognise these as clear signs that my body doesn’t want me to drink any more. See above.
I am successful. It’s not the house, the car, the clothes, the job. It’s the genuine, unconditional love of friends and family that prove to me how successful I am.
I’m OK about having never married or had kids. Society can ‘do one’ if it continues to define me by my marital status and I don’t feel any less of a woman because I haven’t had children.
Don’t like me? I’ll get over it. I no longer put my energy into being liked. All my energy goes into being me and naturally gravitating towards those that accept me for who I am.
I realise how important it is to always be kind. And if I’m not, I’ll own it and make amends.
I’ll do what makes me happy. It’s OK to turn down an invite to a party because I’d rather stay home and finish my book.
I can and I will. No longer will I tell myself I can’t and that I’m not good enough, clever enough, pretty enough, blah, blah, blah. B.O.R.I.N.G
Regrets. I’ve had a few. Giving all my vinyl away is one of them. But no longer will I dwell on past decisions.
There is nothing wrong me, there never was. I’m not perfect, but, there is always room for improvement. 50 is not old. My life is not over, I could just be halfway through and there is still so much left to do…